Episode 198
Aalia Lanius, Founder of Unsugarcoated Media
Today we are combining our storytelling and our creativity to promote social good to overcome some of the issues and challenges we face in our world today. And that's the focus of the creativity of our next guest. Aalia Lanius.
She is a multiple Award-Winning Novelist, Award-Nominated Executive Producer & Podcast host. As founder of Unsugarcoated Media, a 501(c)(3) social enterprise, she is passionate about using her leadership skills to build a unique media company that focuses solely on projects in media geared at social impact through storytelling. Aalia is also the Producer and host of "Unsugarcoated with Aalia", a social good-centered podcast. The show was nominated for Best Use of Podcast for Social Good in 2020. A powerful advocate for survivors of trauma and mental health education.
She believes as creatives, we have an immense gift that comes with accountability and we have to use it to create a positive social impact in everything. She only chooses to speak on social issues unsugarcoated. Hence the name of her company. In our chat, she tells us that the most important part of what Unsugarcoated Media does is provide a place where other creatives can come and collaborate with them, knowing that the goal is social impact.
According to Aalia, “What's the message?” is the first and most important question a creative needs to ask themselves if their goal is social impact through their work. She also enlightens us that If you wanted to have a social message, as an artist, you have to show up to those spaces and say, “This is important to me. This is what I want to happen and if I don't see it, then I'm gonna start creating a wave myself.”
She has experienced so much turmoil. From homelessness to the trauma of domestic abuse, and the cancer fight. And yet there's resilience. Through that, she was able to write a book that has helped so many people who are in those particular situations. Once again she gives us a lesson through it all. She teaches us that that is what influence really is. When you empower the right people to see their own brilliance, and to see their own capacity, and potentially even see a life past trauma.
We need to learn and take away from the experiences that life throws at us how we can learn to be better. It's about understanding that, you wanna grow and that you wanna upgrade your belief systems. You have to yearn to understand yourself better so that you can be more powerful. So that you can be more concerted on whatever the effort is you're trying to do as navigate the journey life has set before you, and maintain your high creative energy.
In conclusion, she reminds us that there is only trying so long as you learn to fail forward. And that is part of the creative process. And learning about yourself is the most powerful thing and then keep growing. And only look back to see how far you've come. And recognize that that is your big thing. Even though sometimes it may take so long to see, there's always hope. And the hope is you.
To get more on her amazing work: unsugarcoatedmedia.com
Instagram: aalia_unsugarcoated
Aalia Lanius
Aalia Lanius is an International Multiple-Award Winning Novelist, Executive Producer and host of the award-nominated globally top-rated social good podcast, UNSUGARCOATED with Aalia. As founder of UNSUGARCOATED Media, a 501(c)(3) media social enterprise, Lanius is creating social impact through storytelling while building community, providing education, and ending isolation for trauma survivors. Aalia's role extends to leadership as a creative, and she is considered a thought-leader in approaches to media, believing that artists are pioneers of the human mind with great potential and responsibility to positively influence society through proper representation and accountability.
@Aalia_unsugarcoated on Instagram
Mark Stinson
Mentioned in this episode:
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Transcript
auto generated transcript
Mark (:Well, welcome back friends to our podcast, unlocking your world of creativity. And what about combining our storytelling and our creativity to promote social good to overcome some of the issues and challenges we face in our world today. And that's the focus of the creativity of our next guest. Aalia Lanius. Aalia welcome to the program.
Aalia (:Hello, Mark. Thank you so much for having me. I'm so excited to be here with you. Thank you.
Mark (:Yeah, you're welcome. And worldwide travels, we've been going from Stockholm to New York to Johannesburg, to Vietnam. And today we're stamping our creative passport in Southern California. So LA is gotta be sunny. we're gonna talk to Aalia about the work, the creativity, the environment. And I think we just start off right there. You are the founder of this great company called UNSUGARCOATED Media, and I guess the UNSUGARCOATED part are some of the difficult social challenges that your program deals with. Tell us a little bit more.
Aalia (:Well, thank you. Yeah. UNSUGARCOATED media is a 501C3 media production enterprise. We use print we use podcasting. We use events as well as a short film to create social impact through storytelling and what I love about it is I actually trademarked on sugarcoated. Because it also does represent a time in my life when I even felt like an advocate. I only choose to speak unsugarcoated on social issues. And I do believe as creatives, we have a responsibility. We have this immense gift that I think comes with accountability to use it, to create social impact, a positive social impact in everything. Every time someone comes to me with a piece of work or art or something. And I'm always, my first question is what's the message What's the message.
Aalia (:If you're just creating a story just to tell it, well, then that's different. But for me, it's, there's always a message within it, even if it's fictional. So that's where it started off. And I found that in 2019, here we are in 2022, and we've done some amazing shorts. We continue to work. We just wrapped our 10th season of Unsugarcoated With Aalia The Podcast. social good podcast I produce but guess what, we're also taking that at the end of summer, we'll be going with the full audience. We're actually gonna be moving to a live studio audience and, and growing that show again. Social good. And the last thing I wanna say to that is the other important part of what we do is we provide a place where other creatives can come and collaborate with us, knowing that the goal is a social impact because I have a lot of people who join our company because they that's what they wanna do. You know, again, they don't wanna just throw something out there to the wind. They want it to have meaning they want it to land and they want it to impact people's lives.
Mark (:Well, the storytelling part will start there. You had had, multiple awards for your novels and things like that. And then of course your passion for this social good, particularly with trauma survivors, as I've listened to some of the programs. When did these things merge? When did you say I've got to use the creativity and the power of the medium to tell the stories of these people?
Aalia (:Well, mark, to be quite honest in 2014, I found myself single as a mother of three. Not uncommon actually, unfortunately, a lot of marriages do end of divorce can end on divorce. And I love a happily ever after tale. But the reality is for the people who do experience trauma validation through storytelling do a lot. It empowers someone. And so at a time in my life, when I could really do anything, I decided to use my skill of writing. I had already previously built very multiple successful businesses and I've always been a good writer. In fact, even in undergrad, it was like, you're such a good writer. Some of my professors would be like, you've written pieces that are better than anything I've written in all my years of teaching. And, I didn't give myself credit for my own ability.
Aalia (:Right. And so when I decided that I was gonna sit down and write my first novel, it did depict a biographical fiction novel because it is depicting my life. It does depict domestic violence. It does depict a toxic relationship and, the journey of a woman who gives herself permission to leave that toxic relationship. The reason why that was important to me, Mark. And I'll tell you how that came is when I was going through the divorce, a lot of people would reach out to me. I've been a leader in my community and somebody who's shared a few my experiences, especially with regard to cancer. When I went through the divorce, a lot of people were surprised, right? And I say because I kinda came from that. Everyone loved my life from the pictures that I put on Facebook. Everybody thought I was burning my God!
Mark (:Can't do anything wrong going on here.
Aalia (:We want Aalia 's life. And then when I would share, people would say, wow, you're empowering me. So I thought, well, how much more could I empower you if you know the truth? And if I could share a bit more, but like a lot of people, I decided to put that in my work and in this effort, this care package, if you will, for the world and also to further even create my own legacy, as well as a, as a person, as an individual. So those two, few, two things fused in 2017 was the first year. No, excuse me, because I had my child in 2017 that had my real child in 2017, February 18th, 2018. I launched my first novel in March 2019. I launched my second novel that won, won three international awards for its hard-hitting message on racism and things like that.
Aalia (:And just although it's a humanitarian message, not a political one and I think that's why it's won the awards and it also represents multiculturalism. So all these things for me definitely resonated. And I'll just say this before I hand it back to you, is that I read a very powerful story. When I was 18 years old, it changed my life. It was Maya Angelou's. I Know Why the Caged Bird Sings reading her story, reading her vulnerability, provided a life raft that I cannot even begin to explain to you at a time when I needed it most. And ultimately my goal with UNSUGARCOATED Media is to continue to do the same with my works as well as other works.
Mark (:I can see how that would influence this. And I guess from a creative standpoint, as the story process, I mean something underneath UNSUGARCOATED says, you're gonna get it all. You're gonna get the tough stuff, the ugly stuff, the sometimes painful, embarrassing whatever it might be. How do you keep it from being just the sort of trials and tribulation story and turn it into empowerment? Certainly the connection you described people wanna know they're not alone. And so reading somebody else's story that might reflect some of their own experiences is helpful, but how do you turn the page then to sort of bringing a message of hope and possibilities.
Aalia (:I mean, I think once again, just being inspired by my life, like knowing that there is, a light at the end of the tunnel in my story, that's what I chose to focus on. Like you just said, yes, there's the heartbreak, there's the crying, there are the moments that are very difficult. In fact, I even had one person read my first novel, and one of the most real and honest scenes about domestic violence, she thought was fake and she's like, oh, well that's a little over the top. And I'm like, I'm sorry if you don't realize that over the top is actually what happens in some people's lives. That's okay, but this is the truth. But at the same token, as you said, it's like you move through that into hopefulness. And for me as an individual, I operate on hope every single day.
Aalia (:I continue to in my own life, I'm a three-time cancer survivor. I could get that call again any day, you know? And people are like, oh, you, they wanna clap for me. And yes, we clap and we celebrate the milestones, but I have a pulse. So things can change any minute. And so the way that my process goes through, yes, like you said, in the messaging, when I sit down and decide what is the story I want to tell, even in the most traumatic, I want there to be that sense of hope. And I mean, I just can say that I purposefully do put those even in my second novel, which has a very tragic point towards the end, at the very end, you're still seeing hope. You're still seeing the glimmer of humanity and the beauty of it.
Mark (:It's so important. Well, and you make me wonder how, I mean, we're talking about novels and podcasts and things now, but, creative artists of all genres of all mediums what might you encourage us to do? Say if you're a photographer, you might be a painter, you might be a musician. How could we use our creativity and storytelling powers to also promote issues that might be important to us?
Aalia (:I mean, I think there's, there are so many different ways Mark, I mean, musicians have such power, you create a song and then you pair that with visuals that go deeper, right. Or even with books, like I think that for books, a lot of novelists, they don't take the opportunity to create some sort of visual that helps extend its or you know, further its impact. Overall, it is about you and what you wanna provide to the world independently as an artist and, however you go about that process. It just has to be intentional. Like I don't sit down with a team of individuals and say, okay, we're going to create this short film and it's not going to have a message behind it. Like that's at the forefront. What is the message?
Aalia (:So once you get that down, really there are so many things you can do and with painting... I mean, and this is the other thing. If you wanted to have a social message, then get in the places, because there are so many, like I said earlier, so many people that social impact is a thing. There's an event that'll be coming up in the summer where I can't say the dates because it's not hard to find yet, but it's all about women creating social impact. That's it. So if you're an artist, look for these types of events, getting as a filmmaker and as a producer, we get out to South by Southwest, as I shared with you, we're getting ready to leave for can film festival tomorrow. And I also think that as an artist, you have to show up to these spaces and say, this is important to me. This is what I want to happen. And, and if I don't see it, then I'm gonna start creating a wave myself. Like there's that option too, right?
Mark (:Yeah, that's right. Well, I always think about the influences in our early careers. I know the first few of my jobs still resonate with me even today. And as I look down the bottom of your resume, you've got A&R for music companies and working with a lot of truly name-brand artists. What about their creative process or just being in their creative orbit influenced you and your career going forward?
Aalia (:Well, interestingly enough because of my background, without going too much into it I was homeless at 14 years old. And I've been on my own since I was 14 years old, largely or at least under the care of people outside of my home. And one of the things that I loved about being in the music industry and yes, working on promotional tours, I've worked with artists like Boyz II Men, Mary J Blige, Aaliyah, and Ginuwine, these were back in the day. And, and the thing is, is that what I loved about the experience was that if you worked hard and you showed up, you could grow. And it was because of that though, that I entered adulthood, like a little bit of a crash landing once I recovered and started to find my flow and where I was good at and where I could Excel, I found that these were industries.
Aalia (:That just, yeah, it was really about the intention you brought and how hard you worked and the people you surrounded yourself with, right? Like the formula to success. And those gave me opportunities. And that's why my first business, by the time I was 22 years old, was actually managing and assisting campaigns for large artists when they came into the San Francisco bay area, as well as throughout the United States. Oh, so going back to I know something more specific, so Unsugarcoated comes from unplugged. Unplugged music was one of the most beautiful things that I experienced. It was raw, it was real. And that very heavily influenced me when it came to deciding really who are you, what are you? I am Unsugar coated. And I definitely was influenced by being around music artists and hearing what authenticity really sounded like.
Mark (:I love that. Well, and you mentioned Mary J Blige, she just received a billboard music award, sort of one of these lifetime achievement type awards, but for her influence, not just that you made your own hits. Well, I think we, as creatives could take more of a note of that. That, yes, we want the awards and yes, we want our own gold records or plaques on the wall, but what about influencing those around us? And not just that we can say back in the day, that was great music, but what are you doing to help artists today?
Aalia (:Yeah. I gotta say something to that because it's so true people in this influencer, right? I'm an influencer and we're all influencers of some, if you're a parent, you're an influencer if you're technical,
Mark (:Doesn't matter how many likes you get every day
Aalia (:A lot of people, some of the biggest names, I know don't care about a blue checkmark on their IG. They don't care about how many likes, that's not truly reflective of your influence in the world. You can walk into the store and smile at somebody and have an influence on somebody who might be about to take their life. You, your influence is not dictated by the number at the top of any page. But what I love about what you said is the recognition that our influence it does go through our art. And that's why I say it's such a powerful responsibility. I had shared a story one day about an experience I went through and this woman came back and sent me a message because she, I'll share with you two, two instances, but this woman, in particular, she had a tattoo of a spider put on her hand, a tattoo because of a story that I told about a spider that had lost its leg, but was still fighting and kept going.
Aalia (:It was all related to when I was dealing with cancer and a fellow cancer fighter whose son comes in with a little spider, his leg is broken. He's like, look, mom, the spider's still fighting. Just like you. It changed her whole perspective. So I shared this story. This woman went and got a tattoo. She was dealing with her own health challenges, wasn't even cancer. It was a chronic illness. And she told me that the story had inspired her so much that she wanted to look at that spider with a broken leg on her hand to be reminded of a second story. After I had published the first novel a woman wrote to me and said, I've now decided I'm gonna file for divorce from an abusive husband after reading your story because that's how much I feel empowered. And to that point, when I wrote my book, a lot of times, people would say, so it was very cathartic writing your novel. Was it cathartic? Was it cathartic? And I'd always say, no, no, no, no, no. For me quite the opposite for me, I was healed when I went, wrote that book, Mark, it was not a tell-all it wasn't a...
Mark (:You weren't right in it just to get it out.
Aalia (:Yeah, no, it was to empower others. And that's what influence really is when you empower the right people to see their own brilliance, to see their own capacity, and to potentially even see a life past trauma. Right. So, and sadness and difficulty, hence every sad love song. Every romantic comedy out there. Yeah, that, that, that's how influence rings with me and how seriously I take it. And I see that we, it extends more than like just what people think it does.
Mark (:Yes. I agree. Well, let's talk about building community and collaborators. You mentioned that your media company can also attract other people looking to tell their stories, but what kind of circle of supporters and collaborators have you had to build, this is not a one-person job, isn't that a one-woman company. So let's talk about that.
Aalia (:Yeah. No company should be by one person. Then you become the bottleneck. that's when things go wrong. I'm very thankful. I've had amazing people on my journey. One of my greatest supporters I have to mention is Larry Namer the co-founder of E entertainment. He has been a guiding voice for me as somebody in the TV world. And who's been extremely successful at it. And somebody I really respect. My husband has been a great supporter. My husband is a filmmaker majoring in motion picture. Filmmaker has done films with names such as Zach Efron, Nicole Kidman Robert DeNiro. He just recently did ones with Kiana Reeves, Lily Collins, Tiffany Haddish, Oscar Isaac I mean some, some names that are familiar to some people out there, but what I love is he's quite humble. And I say this very, honestly, he's quite humble and a great guy, but having his support, having him turn to me and say, whatever it is that you need, I've got you, I've got your back.
Aalia (:That makes a huge difference for me. And then on top of it, as you said, I think that when you radiate, when you are putting out into the universe and putting out to the world, what you're doing, it's not a problem to attract. You become a magnet for the things that you want and the collaborators that you're hoping for. And for me, that's been it. So a lot of the people that we collaborated with, I mean, Karina Miller, Karina Kean's sister, has collaborated with us and just Michael Uslan, the creator of Batman. I mean just incredible people that come and show up. And then they offer their time to the events that we hold. And to the products that we produce, and then the community. I would not be sitting here doing what I'm doing if it wasn't for the people who consume our content and then turn around and let me know we're doing the right thing. And, we're resonating with them.
Mark (:That makes a lot of sense, well, I'm glad I asked because I mean, it's always a network and people talk about them, who you know, you know? And it's not just about literally who but the idea of building this community or this network around you to make these things viable. Yeah.
Aalia (:Yeah. I mean, the community is everything. And you know, people always say that the saying your net is your net worth. And to some extent that's true. But I think that what's more important is that if you're trying to go higher, if you're like, for example, that's why Larry and not a lot of people know Larry's name or even Michael Yulin. These are people that they don't understand. They're the brain behind, yes. This magic, you know? And Larry he is been so successful on TV. So this is why I'm saying you wanna put yourself aligned with people who know the journey. You're trying to take you can't go to somebody who's never run a successful entertainment company or even a network. And then say, how do I do this? Right.
Mark (:How do I make a network? Yeah.
Aalia (:How do I make a network? They're gonna be like, I don't know, go to somebody who's done it. Well, that's the point that is very critical to what you're trying to do. So it's not just about putting people around you who sound cool and make you think you look good. It's about putting people around you that can actually help elevate you and get you to where it is that you're going.
Mark (:Perfect. Well, Aalia, I've got one last question before we close, but I'd like to make sure people know where to find you and follow you and learn more about your company and your work overall.
Aalia (:Thank you so much, Mark. So I'm really a OneStop girl with, I'm not gonna lie. IG UNSUGARCOATED Aalia underscore UNSUGARCOATED, UNSUGARCOATED media.com is the website. It's very easy. I'll tell you how much this is, how people should know. This is not, about me though. I am part of the brand. I am actually absolutely the brand. I am the Oprah of UNSUGARCOATED media. However, I've never done Aaliaalanius .com. I don't point people to that because again, this is part of my legacy. It's not just about me. I'm looking for people who are part of this vision, and then they'll get handed down like this is an ongoing journey that will go beyond me, but it's not just about me. This is really about everybody else. So UNSUGARCOATED media.
Mark (:We'll definitely do that. Well, as we think about our creativity and we've used the word a lot in these last few minute's journeys I can't help, but think about the journeys, the lives of the creative people who might be listening and you've experienced so much yourself and the homelessness, the trauma of domestic abuse, the cancer fight. And yet there's resilience. Let's end on that high note because it's, it is an unsugarcoated life. Most of us lead. And if we let everybody see behind the fake zoom background. You never know what we might see, but give us your insight and experience of how you were able to, navigate that journey and maintain your high creative energy.
Aalia (:There are a couple of things. One of them is understanding that my brain needs to be updated. My belief systems. Like I come from great family background, great family, amazing family. Actually, I had the most amazing experiences as a child, but I also had traumatic ones largely because of outdated belief systems that they didn't really grow with. So for me, it's not about it's what I've learned and what I've taken away from the experiences, and how I can learn to be better. How I can learn to be more emotionally intelligent. I read somebody actually asked me what a book I recommend. And I'll tell you actually is the Alchemist, the Alchemist, it's a fictional book, but it's so powerful. Fantastic. Like every time I read that, there's like a light, a fire under my butt. That's just like, okay, what is my purpose? Right?
Aalia (:And so it's about understanding that, you wanna grow and you wanna upgrade your belief systems, understand yourself better so that you can be more powerful so that you can be more concerted on whatever the effort is you're trying to do. And for me, it's opening myself up to the realization. As I said, I will keep growing until the day I die. I've upgraded my belief systems, mark, but they're gonna be upgraded again in the next 10 years, hopefully, because that's the evolution that becomes our revolution and how we can stand here. I think that's, what's so beautiful about aging, right? I'm a grandmother, I'm a grandmother, a mother of four and people are like, wait, what?
Mark (:No way!
Aalia (:Yes. I love it. I love it. Natural grandmother too. That's from my oldest daughter, who's 25. And I think that people need to understand that it's continual growth. There's no such thing as failing. There's only trying so long as you learn to fail forward. And I think that is part of the creative process. Right. And learning about yourself. And I think that that is the most powerful thing for me is to take the time, to understand myself, know myself and then keep growing, keep growing as time. So to your last point, sorry about resilience, there's for good that a bad doesn't come. Even in the most tragic misfortunes, sometimes it takes 20 years maybe more to see, to look back. There are a lot of people that say, well, don't look back, listen, only look back to see how far you've come. And recognize that that is my big thing. And, and sometimes it takes so long to see that, but there's always hope. And the hope is you. So thank you so much for having me share with your audience.
Mark (:Absolutely. No. And thanks for sharing the journey we often talk about the creative process, but then you've, you've intertwined our life journey with the creative process and how one can feed the other. And it's very helpful. Well, my guess has been Aalia Lanius. Aalia can't thank you enough. What a great conversation. I appreciate it so much.
Aalia (:Thank you so much. Thank you so much. I appreciate you. And I'll have to see you again.
Mark (:Oh, we will. Well, let me know how it goes in Cannes. Yes, absolutely. I'll be following IG to see the pictures from the French Riviera and all the beautiful scenery, and beautiful people.
Aalia (:I'll be excited to share. It'll be the first time back in two years, we're normally there, but of course the pandemic. So a lot of people everyone's showing up, we're ready
Mark (:To go. It should be quite a party. Well, Aalia Lanius has shared with us about social good creativity. She's got a great media company called UNSUGARCOATED media, and we'll be sure to check it out. And this is just the kind of podcast we wanna continue to bring you about how we get inspired for new ideas, but also how we organize those ideas and begin to think about the community and begin thinking about the structure of our stories, but then ultimately how we gain the confidence and the connections to launch the work out into the world. And that's what we're all about. So come back again. Next time we'll continue around the world travels and I'm Mark Stinson and we'll be unlocking your world of creativity. Bye for now.
