Jay H Tepley, New Era Superhero

Welcome back friends to our podcast, Unlocking Your World of Creativity. And today as we look for ways to unlock our creativity and launch our workout into the world, I wanna start off with a conversation on a very provocative statement from our guests today, that if you're having trouble, you're feeling stuck. It's not because you have business problems, but rather you have personal problems that are showing up in your business, in your creative work. So we're gonna explore that in many more topics about becoming a new hero in this world. With our guest, Jay Tepley. Jay, welcome to the program.

Hello, and really excited to be here today.

Yeah, Jay, we're stamping our passport in your hometown of London today. You know, we travel all around the world, and it's great to be in your city of London today. What, what is this idea that you say we have personal problems showing up in our business, and that's really the hurdle that we have to overcome?

Absolutely. And I would say this is key for every entrepreneur who wants to succeed. And in fact, many people who really did make it in business understood this at some point, that your business is an extension of you. So everything that you are going through personally is reflected in your choices, in your productivity, and ultimately in the way that your business grows. And as an entrepreneur myself, I understand it really well. And I could see from my own example where if there was certain struggles, internal shadows fears, doubts, that would all reflect in the way that I structure my business, in the way that I interact with clients or potential clients. And the kind of people that I interact into are my business. And other people that I spoke to over the years, they all said the same thing. The quality of your customers or your students directly reflects the quality of your thoughts and your inner work.

Well, and we created people. Of course, there's the usual ups and downs, but sometimes it does cross over into true mental health challenges. And you've been researcher and a advocate for mental health. You know, help us think about overcoming, you know, a true depression, you know, that, that we're just feeling not just a little blue, but we're really facing a wall.

Right. I love this question, and I think it's really relevant, especially today when more and more people come across well up and personal with the topic of depression, because I don't know if our listeners know, but the rate of male depression and suicides is nearly double that of female. And there is a reason for that because the male mind is structured in a way that men need an action plan and action steps to resolve some situation and, and to really succeed in whatever task they set themselves to achieve. Whereas for women, it's a bit easier because the majority, obviously everyone is different, but the majority have a greater access to their intuition, to that inner voice, you know, gut feeling. And in our changing world that has a lot of pressure and the accelerating speed of things happening, it's easier if you can navigate blindfolded, if you can still make choices without knowing all the variables.

And this is why I believe one of the reasons why men are more affected by mental health issues is because the variables are changing too fast and you can't really catch up with them. So that's one thing. And another thing that specifically is relevant for male entrepreneurs is that male entrepreneurs are not actually like the general public and know many people to talk about that because I think it could be perceived as an ego issue, but it's not. So to be an entrepreneur, to be someone who plays his own trail, instead of just following the mold, need to have a very different kind of mindset and personality to begin with. And this kind of a different mindset translates into other things in your life that most people don't realize. And one of those things is thinking, feeling and perceiving the world in a different way.

And so for an entrepreneur who falls on some difficulties, emotional mental difficulties, there is not much help available because from what I've na, the therapist and the coaching groups are mainly designed to support what we call the average Joe. Someone who is, say, work in nine to five, who goes with the crowd, who just follows certain principles established by the society, not someone who decides to go and create his own world. And that person and the person that creates their own world. Because of the difference in the mindset, when you try to apply the tools that work perhaps really well for the general public to entrepreneurs, to influencers to celebrities, they actually don't work. And sometimes they work against that person, they actually create damage. So interesting. Yeah, and it's interesting just to quickly, just to quickly cause uh, because not just how many rich influential people, how many celebrities on growth or even take their own lives. And you would think those people would have access to the best of the best help that is available, but it still doesn't happen. So this is why I'm here.

Yeah. And it is counterintuitive that you would think they can access the best help available, but don't. I also was wondering about, you know, you have kind of a counterintuitive approach to, you know, male entrepreneurs. You know, on the one hand we're advocating and, you know, empowering women and we want to support and advocate, you know, their acceleration both in the business world and, and even their personal development. And yet you say that there's a gap that we always think men had an advantage in networking or an advantage in, you know, their careers and even in maybe starting a business, but you saw a real gap in the support that men need.

Absolutely. And it comes on two levels. So the first level is that, as I explain, men need an action plan and the satisfaction steps to do something. And it's really easy if you go with the crowd because you have blueprints for pretty much anything. You know, you want to become a lawyer, you research how to become a lawyer, you want to become a co, you just know what to do, right? So everything is laid out for you. However, for an entrepreneur, it's not as straightforward because obviously there are some business principles, but the real secret songs for anyone who wants to succeed in business is being himself or herself fully. And the people who can step into their truth and express it creatively are the people who really crush it. And people who stand out. Now, in our society as it stands, there is no ready made blueprint for people of how to achieve their inner truth and ultimate unfoldment to succeed quite the opposite.

So the idea of go as the crowd, do what you told, follow what everyone is doing, is very strong. And to break free from that mold is a real challenge, especially if you're doing it on your own with no mentor by your side. And so this is one kind of a struggle and another kind of a struggle for men specifically, is that men need something that they could rely on in terms of producing results. Unlike women who are more content with things being vague and intuitive, and things happen, say, go with the flow and see what the universe delivers. A true masculine principle wants to be in control, wants to be a creator of his reality, his life be in charge. But for that, men need more understanding of their true nature, which in our society is nearly wiped out as far as they see.

There is a huge emphasis on, I would say, almost eradicating masculinity and what it means so that everyone is the same. Everyone is say meek and submissive, because the masculine principle is the principle of creation of well, standing against the rules in a good way or a bad way. But it's still, it's, it's standing alone is creating your own reality is becoming in charge of who you ultimately are and what you bring out to the world. And so I would say that with the loss of this right of passage, which ancient societies had for boys to become men, many men lost that connection to their true power because they don't know their subconscious mind, their soul, or even their conscious mind. They don't know when is that border, when is that threshold after which they cease to become just boys and grow up and become fully fledged men, powerful people in church of their reality. And what I observe right now is there are many, essentially boys in up men bodies that suffer because they don't see their way forward.

It's interesting, I wanted to go back and maybe connect two points that you were making. Certainly there's a, you know, spiritual reality that, that there's transformational principles, but, but you really highlight, you know, you're not, you're not asking us to just accept some, some woo woo here that you know, is gonna change everything. You're also responding. The other point you were making is that men do tend to want this action plan. Uh, we wanna look at the revenues, we wanna look at the production, we wanna look at the progress. So how, how do you combine these two in a way that men can really lock in and say, this is not simply a sort of mental exercise, but rather it's a productivity and results oriented practice to pursue.

Absolutely. Well, just like that quote that you started with, you don't have business problems. You have personal problems reflected in your business. It means that if you become a more powerful, whole and integrated being, your business will prosper. And you will take over the compensation that stumbles in their own fears, traumas, and insecurities. And the way forward is, well, it's popular with some people, not popular with other people, but it's nonetheless the truth. We are not just the physical beings, not just the bodis that we see in the mirror. We are a combination of the physical part and the spiritual energy part, The soul, the spirit Des Moines. And we need to address both parts, and we need to integrate them to work, perform, and run our business to our ultimate capacity. And the best way to understand that is that imagine if in your everyday life, for whatever reason, you made a choice of not ever using the left part of your body for anything.

So you would still have it there, it would be perfectly healthy, but you would just decide that from now on, you know, only using your right foot, your right arm, and that's it. Now, imagine if you actually did that, how much that would impair the quality of your life and everything that you do, right? And so what many people don't realize is that not integrating your spiritual aspect has the same effect on your life as not integrating your body fully. And the transformation that results from it can't even be described in words. So people who really crushed it, people who are really successful, they don't necessarily talk about it, but if you probe them, and I spoke to many of them, if you probe them, they will say, Well, actually, I'm into manifestation, dude. And I'm like, Okay, yeah, I understand what you mean. Because ultimately, the sooner you understand that there is more to this world than you've been told, than just this limiting phy physical reality, the faster you will be on your way to healing, to eradicating your doubts and shadows, which will then reflect in your business and the happier and the more fulfilled he will be as a human being.

Mm-hmm. , Jay, give us an example or, or a action step, You know, if I could grab onto that thought that we could take, you know, we, we finished the podcast and we say, I really do wanna just take the first step. What is a activity or an exercise that we might employ?

Brilliant. I love this question. I would say the best step is mindfulness. And not just mindfulness in terms of, Oh, I just want to be mind throughout the day, but practical mindfulness, and this is what you do. So you set up an on your phone, say, five times a day, this is what I recommend, but you can do three times a day. And so as soon as the alarm goes off, give yourself 30 seconds. And that's important because with 30 seconds, you have no excuse. You will have to practice that. So for those theones, do the simple thing. Notice as your breathing and make it a little bit deeper, just a little bit. Relax your shoulders, relax your jaw. We usually carry a lot of tension in our body without realizing and analyze what it is you're doing in that moment. Read it and why, and what you are feeling and why.

So for example, say if you're in a room, how does it make you feel to feel happy? Do you feel unhappy? Do you feel stressed? Do you feel joyful? Do you feel hopeful? Say you are with someone again, really, honestly, ask yourself, how does that person make me feel? Deep down? And the important thing is not to judge your observations as they come in. Imagine yourself as a scientist or a researcher that goes into a new unknown world, and his only task is to write down everything that he finds without describing any value to anything, but simply rising things down. And so once you have those observations written down in your mental note, bud, ask yourself a simple question. Why? So for example, you're sitting with someone and you realize that you're feeling sad and you didn't realize that before the exercise because you, you started doing this exercise and you think, Actually, I'm feeling sad. And then ask yourself, why, why is that feeling? Now, you may not be able to answer it on the spot, and that's right, but remember it and come back to it later on when you have some time for yourself. And just by doing that, you will integrate different parts of your mind, your conscious and your subconscious, or your ego and your soul. And that is the first step to your spiritual healing and liberation. And it's super powerful.

Well, you brought up some interesting things there that I've been thinking about and other guests, you know, and even across the news and in the business world, it's, it's very popular now to say, bring your whole self to work. You know, be authentic, expose your feelings, let other people know who you really are. And yet, especially I can speak for myself, but also other men who would say, That is not my style, that is not in my dna. And so it, it takes a little extra mm, you know, to overcome that natural block, you know, or that keep, keep the shade half shut. We don't want everybody to see inside . Mm-hmm. , you know, what, what's the answer? I guess? What's the step we could take as we become more authentic and more available to others?

Well, the thing is, everyone really wants to be authentic. They've done, and if you want to prove, look at kids like little children, how they are in their element. They are authentic before, I mean, before the world conditioning kicks in and makes them feel afraid or ashamed, just little kids, they want to express themselves in the way that they are. But the problem for many grownups is that as we grow up, we tend to forget what it is we really are. And if you say to someone who doesn't remember how to express his truth, like, be yourself, be authentic. What it does, and the reason why it comes with a push and with an effort, is because essentially it forces that person to create another persona, to create a version of himself, yet another mask that seems extroverted and just all over the place in, in some instances.

Because if you don't know, you don't remember how to express yourself, and someone says, Well, you need to express yourself. You think, Well, what do I really do? I guess if I become more loud and obnoxious, that would be it. But then you think, Well, but I'm not loud and obnoxious person, which means that if I don't do that, I'm not myself. You know, there is a stereotype of how yourself being yourself or being authentic means disregard for good mothers or social rules, and just being a certain way that, again, loud and obnoxious comes to mind because it's, it's, it's is another stereotype. And because so few people know how to be authentic, then this is where that effort and that rigidity comes from. Because once you remember, and this is that exercise that they just gave you, serves that purpose. Once you remember how to be authentic, you don't actually want to be inauthentic anymore because it takes a lot more effort and you know, with human beings and lazy by nature. So you want to go with what's easier and more pleasurable. And I promise you that being yourself truly is a lot easier, is a lot more effortless, is a lot more fulfilling for your heart and your soul. And everyone who tapped into that superpower, they don't ever want to go back to creating some sort of a mask or a persona. So that is really the difference.

That's very good. Thanks for the encouragement and the insight. Well, Jay, before we close, I want to ask you about some of your personal creative passions. But first tell us how we can stay in touch with you and find you, learn more about you and follow your work.

Oh, I would love you guys to get in touch with me. I am here to help. I, my, my whole work is here to support you. My website is New Era superhero super easy to remember, new era superhero.com, and you can also find me on Amazon. So I've got several books. This is one of them. If you type j ly my name, you will find me. You will also find me on social media as JH and new era superhero. And do feel free to get touch. I'm a very sociable person. I love meeting new people, and I also strongly believe that the more man step into their power, the better our world is going to be.

Oh, fantastic. Well, some of your own creative passions are in Japanese culture. You have we're talking about your one book, but you also have a novel, The Light Watch Chronicles, and that's true. You've studied a lot in Tokyo. But tell us about your interest in Japanese culture.

All right, so let me begin with actually showing the book that you've mentioned is this book and it's being made by a wonderful company called Be Here. It's being made into dramatized audio series, so you can actually experience it as an audio, well as an audio movie and step into that world. And yes, I absolutely love Japan. I studied there and I lived in Tokyo. I still speak fluent Japanese and I love Japanese culture and calligraphy. I think it's very soothing for the mind and really helps you to focus and to discover more of your creative abilities, because as you ride those very complex Chinese Japanese characters, it really teaches you something about focus and discipline.

Fantastic. Well folks, my guest has been Jay Tepley. Jay, what a great conversation. I really appreciate you being on the program.

Thank you so much for inviting me today. I love talking to you.

Yes, indeed. And Jay is an entrepreneur and a international speaker and coach, a passionate mental health advocate. And as we've just heard, an author in our own right, a Lifelong Geek, and we've talked about research and all sorts of sort of, not just experience based, but research based actions that we can take. So Jay, thanks again for the insights and the experience that you've shared.

My absolute pleasure.

And listeners come back again next time we'll continue our around the world journeys where we stamp our creative passports all over the world to talk to creative practitioners about how they get inspired for new ideas and how they organize Isaac organize those ideas, and of course, how they gain the confidence and the connections to launch their work out into the world. So until next time, I'm Mark Stinson and we're unlocking your world of creativity. We'll see you soon see.