Maureen Falvey, Peak Performance: Mindset Tools for Entrepreneurs

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Welcome back for, to our podcast, Unlocking Your World of Creativity, where we go around the world talking to creative practitioners about how they get inspired and how they organize those ideas. And most of all, how they gained the confidence and the connections to launch their work out into the world. And we're talking with the guest today who has had her fair share of launches and strategies and branding and marketing positioning. My guest is Maureen Fy. Maureen, welcome to the show.

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Thanks so much, Mark. It's wonderful to be here.

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Oh, it's great to be talking with another advertising practitioner. Uh, Maureen's career dates back, uh, into agencies like Sati and Sat and Gray and others working on, you know, global brands and worldwide clients. And we were just, uh, chatting about how we may not miss all those meetings and the late night redeyes back from California, but we sure miss some of the excitement and the creativity more. Maureen, I gotta think right off the bat, as you're coaching now and mentoring and really helping clients, especially in the advertising field, but you know, in many creative fields, why does a quote unquote professional still need a coach? You know, you do think about athletes, they're on a pro team, but they still have a coach, don't they?

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Yeah, they do. Um, that is such a great question. I would say the first thing that comes to mind is that as humans, we're not great at holding ourselves accountable. Hmm. Right. We, our brain, our little monkey brain wants to go back into a habit, a good one or a bad one. And, uh, I think we need to interrupt that and say out loud to someone else, what we're going to do or what we're not. It's why I have a coach, right. So that I can say, I'm gonna do, here's my goal, here's by when I will do this thing. And I've said it out loud to another human. And, um, there's a, there's a, I have a quick but, uh, powerful and kind of cute story about that. But they, um, they did this study with preschoolers on the power of your word. You know, if you say out loud to someone else, are you gonna do the thing?

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And they said to the kids, Okay, kids, we're gonna hide a gift behind the chair and leave the room, uh, and we don't want you to peak. And the researchers left the room and all the kids peaked cuz there was a gift behind the chair. They took a second set of kids and they said, Okay, kids, we're gonna put a gift behind the chair and we don't want you to peak. Do you promise you won't peak? And these three year olds didn't even know what that word meant, but they knew what it meant to look someone else in the eye and say they were, or they were not going to do something. The researchers left the room and none of the kids peaked. When people say to me in a session that they want something, we work through a specific process deep to neuroscience to make sure to move anything that's in the way. And ps that's usually fear, uh, to move anything that's in the way of that thing happening of them vibrating at a really high frequency. So that is why coaching helps so that we can do the thing that we said we were gonna do, that we want, that will help us have tremendous satisfaction at working in life.

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Well, terrific. And I think about, you know, in, in your career, I don't know about you, but I was probably 10 years into advertising before I even knew the word mentor, let alone had one or was one. But you know, it's an industry not really known for coaching and helping and supporting and building others. , it was usually how fast can I get the promotion or can I get my idea bought over somebody else? I mean the the dog eat dog sort of thing. Yeah. When, when do you think that transition began? Because I know there's some differences now, and when for you, did you say, I'm not just directing the teams, but I'm really trying to build the teams?

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Um, part of it is as you, as you so well know in advertising and marketing, it's a game of talent. And we usually wake up and say, maybe there should be something we should be doing differently when people start to leave . And so people started to advo. I mean, when I was raised in advertising, you just worked and worked and worked and you didn't, if you had any needs, you certainly didn't, certainly didn't communicate them. But then at some point people said, Geez, if, if your job boss person is to get the best work outta me, let's talk about what those conditions are. Right? I wanna grow, I wanna learn. I would like some access to training and development. I'd love to have a coach. I would love a mentor. Um, and I think it shifted too from this command and control into more empathy. We see people as humans and, you know, why wouldn't we set up for them what they need for their growth and development? It's just crazy. So we, we ha we, we are still having that wake up call on the journey to more empathetic leadership. But we see people now and we set them up for success and, uh, we invest in them and I think it's a wonderful shift. Yeah. And so they stay. So the great resignation has helped as well because people, I don't wanna lose all this good talent.

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Well, and let's go, let's go back to the fear as motivator . It's like, if I lose my team, if I lose all the people, uh, that's all we have.

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Yeah. You know, um, Mark, there was the, uh, executive creative director who came to me from a big agency. And, um, his first question, we were five minutes into this session, and he said, I want you to prove to me that fear doesn't work as a motivator. And I took him back to his early years in his career, and, uh, within, I don't know, five minutes after that, the man was in tears because he realized no, that, and he was, we're all creative people, but what he realized, not only did it not feel good, but you cannot access where creativity lies if you're in a state of fear. You just can't

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Mm-hmm. so good. Yeah. And you're, you're coaching and training some of these, uh, advertising professionals who, who aren't just looking for their individual contribution to improve, but rather their own leadership and managerial style to improve, compare and contrast those. What what are some of the differences you've seen?

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Yes. They, you , um, they usually come for themselves and then realize the benefit to the rest of the team. Right. So we cannot, I, I talk a lot about, um, wanting to be the leader that everyone wants to work with. And for, unless you're doing both of those things, your followership is going to suffer. Right. So if you can be self-aware, I think it's like 90% of people will say they're self-aware, but only 10%, 10 to 15% are, It's not that we're bad, it's just that we're not asking,

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We're not as self-aware as we think we're

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In. Yeah. So, so when you get that self awareness piece and then the, you balance that with being able to look beyond the nose on your face once you've taken care of you. So the action metaphor is overused for a reason. We do have to be full before we have something to give. Then we look out and we say, what do these people need? And they're all different, right? So that part of the journey is for them to really see a lot of people will lead with that golden rule that we learned as children, like do unto others as you would've done unto you. But that's not it. It's due unto others as they would've done unto them. Now, if you've got a team of 10 people, some people might look at that as exhausting. Maybe they shouldn't be leading, Right? Other people say, Oh, how fascinating.

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How do I unlock the potential of each and every one of these 10 people? But you asked such a great question that no one's ever asked me. We, you have to do the first part first. You have to make sure that you are whole, that you are self-aware, that you're aware of someone's experience of being on the other side of you before you can possibly tend to the rest of the team. Um, so yeah, we work on the individual, we work on their leadership influence and followership, and then we do a lot of great work at strong training and coaching with teams as well.

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Right. So, good. And I always think, you know, we always felt like you were only as good as your last idea. You know, , have you had a hit lately? , You know, and uh, have you seen that kind of, I'll call it ROI on coaching, but I mean, have really the creative people seen a difference in the work? It's one thing to say I see a difference in my team or my dynamic. Yeah. But you know, ha have I seen the results of this?

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Yes. Because if you take the gentleman I mentioned before, he said, Prove to me fear doesn't work as a motivator. Once we did that good work, he was able to go back to his team and use empowerment, inspiration, um, making it safe to fail, Right? So someone tries something, he says, Oh, that didn't work, let's try something else. So you can bet that creativity is off the charts because there's nothing in the way. So that the, and the metaphor that I, that I share with many of my creative clients, and again, we're all creative people. Mm-hmm. is of children on a playground. Um, if you ever watch children play, they are not comparing themselves to the kid next to them. I'm not incentivizing, I'm not giving 'em 10 bucks to get across the monkey bars. They're guided by something intrinsic, internal, their personal best.

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And so, and they don't, and they're also not self-conscious. They're not looking around and be like, Oh, I just fell. I hope no one saw that. So if we can bring that experience of a playground and we're guided by personal best and we're not, not comparing, and we never are saying like, What have you done for me lately? When's your next good idea? But we have an abundance mindset that of course another one is coming. And of course I'm here to support you in service of that. It's just a very, it's a playful dynamic and so much more spills out of that than the fear dynamic in the competition. Mm-hmm.

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. Well, Maureen, I think a lot of our listeners say, you know, what, what would it be like to work with a coach? You know, what, what is that experience? So maybe we could even just take a little moment to peek inside what an interaction with you might be and some of the tools and techniques that you might share with a client in terms of, you know, how do we begin to reprogram and rethink our approach? What, what, what's one of those techniques that we might use as an example?

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Yeah. I've got a good one for you that will help you coach yourself. And I wish, my wish for everyone is that we had a coach, an accountability partner in our pocket so that we were unleashed. Um, so the tool that we use most often at str strong training and coaching, first of all, all of our coaches are also trainers. So we have all of the tips, tricks and tools and the best of the best from Harvard Business Review and the rest right on the shelf. But the tool that we use in the sessions is, um, it sounds silly , but it's steeped in neuroscience and it's, and we whoop it up. So it's called a whoop a w o o p. And the w is the wish. So in any coaching session, the first thing I ask my coachee is, what is your wish?

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What is your goal for this session? Because I don't wanna just have, I'm sure we'd have a lovely conversation, but I that I want more than that for you at the end of this 60 minutes. I want you to have something you didn't have before. And I want you to do something you didn't think you were gonna do when you leave me. So the wish is, what is our goal? What is our focus for this session? The first o is the outcome. What is the ripple effect of that thing coming true? So now the person's starting to get motivated and they're seeing it as tremendous positivity. When I advocate for that promotion, I will be able to lead more people and have influence on more people and drive the growth and development. And so you see it and the clients, well, la la la la, la, right? So what is this outcome? There might even be a ripple effect to my family. Mm-hmm. , come home happy . Right? And so the brain, imagine

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That.

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Yeah. Imagine that. So your brain is now really invested in that w that wish happening the next oh, and would be crazy not to look at this is what are the obstacles? What, if anything is in the way? And there can be external ones, Well, I wanna advocate for a promotion, but there's not a spot open or an internal one. I don't think I'm good enough. I dunno if my boss believes, I dunno if I can do it. What if I fail? Right? So we look at those and then the p is the plan to move them. And there are lots of different tips and tricks and tools for that, but that's, we're just getting stuff out of the way. Mm-hmm. , right? We're declaring what we want, we're seeing it, and then we're moving anything that might be in the way of you having that thing. Yes. Or that you Yeah. So that you can maximize your potential. So we

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And you Yeah. Yeah. That's good. And I love the whooping it up because uh, you know, there you do have to put some enthusiasm and, and emotional power behind it. Well, when you're talking with people, and I'm sure it varies, but do you find they get stuck on one of those letters? You know, either, Well, I can't really articulate my wish all the way to, Well that all sounds well and good, but I'm not willing to take the actual steps, you know, in the plan.

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What a great question. They always know the barrier , they always

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Isn't that easy.

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They know what's in,

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I can't do it.

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It's the wish. It's the, it's the goal. It's saying out loud to another human that they want something because you can't put the genie back in the bottom. Mm-hmm. . So now it's out there. So now I've declared it, and now this lady that ladies me is gonna make me do something about it. . Yes. Now she, so they can,

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Going back to the accountability, is that what you're saying? Yes,

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Exactly. They can feel it already starting to happen when they say that thing that they want. Yeah. So it's a w

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It's so interesting because, you know, I wish I could get the promotion is one thing, but you know, I wish I could hit a home run with an idea. I wish I could go to that client meeting I've never been invited to because I'm too junior or, you know, whatever that, that wish is. I can see how maybe, depending on the, I don't know the, the creative level or the managerial level, I mean the wish might, And, and of course now you were talking about the great resignation. You know, I wish I could work at home. I wish I could have more time with my family. Whatever the case might be. Do you find some of those wishes are more professional or more personal driven?

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You know, it's interesting. When I started on this journey after almost 30 years in advertising, I, so our ceo, Mark Strong, is strong training in coaching. I met with him and I said, Listen, I, you know, his business was growing by leaps and bounds. And he said, I can't do all the coaching anymore and I need to trainer and whatever. And I said, That's great, but I don't, I, I'm a business coach, I don't do life coaching. And he said, It's all life . It's all so yes. You know, and sometimes people apologize at front. They're like, Oh, I'm so sorry I mentioned my life. I'm like, that's cool. I mean it all kind of whatever you're, I can guarantee that whatever you're struggling with at work, you're also struggling with in life and vice versa. We don't change who we are. Whatever you're up against, whether it's your belief in yourself or cultivating confidence or advocating for yourself, setting boundaries, you're doing the same thing at home. Mm-hmm.

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. And do you find that the intensity of those obstacles, you know, if we're really good at that one o , we can always visualize and describe, but is the intensity of that, you know, we could all say not enough hours in the day or, you know, whatever the case might be, but you know, how, how does one begin to dial those obstacles down or create contingency plans to work around them, you know, rather than just focusing on the all the reasons we can't do something.

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Yeah. Um, part of it is the coach. Part of it is the coach. I mean we, uh, you mentioned mentoring before. It's not so the mentor is awesome. Um, but a mentor tells, a coach asks. And so the very, they very, So in this process of me asking their solution for something, their confidence increases. Now I might ask, would you mind if I share a thought? Cuz I've been in this industry for a hundred years. Um, but they start to get that belief in themselves because the answer is inside of them all the time. How to move that barrier was inside of them all the time. And then we also get a little bit, some of it's normalizing. I mean, we are the inner stuff right. Is not serving us. And once they realize that we all are card carrying members of the, I'm not good enough club, it almost becomes silly.

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It's like, is that the card you wanna carry? Right? What do you want it to say? Rip up that one. What's your new card? You know? So we do a little bit of playing because what we realize is the only thing in the way is ourselves. All of these beliefs that we have are, they're not true. Some of them might be. And then I'll deal with that with you. If you say, I'm coming because I wanna be a great presenter, and every time I'm up on the stage, I, uh, pass out . That's gonna be a different whoop .

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Yes. That is true training.

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Yes. Right? . So, but oftentimes that stuff that's in the way is an old narrative or an old belief that does not belong to anyway. So anymore. So I might say to you, somebody said, I'm never gonna be able to stay with that one. I'm never gonna be a great presenter, but I know it's not founded, It's not true yet. So I say, Well, where, where did that message come from? How true was it really? What is another more empowering thought you could replace it with? Um, there's another tool that I love. You can anyone listening coach yourself with this one. It's called Breakthrough laser coaching. Next time you're stuck and you think you can't do something, go back to a time where you did something similar and had success around it and see if you can apply whatever you did then to the current circumstance.

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Mm-hmm. . Right? Because you can't, and you have a choice if you want, if you, if there's something in your way and you wanna let fear be in front, that is your life. It is your choice. And I'll let that put that right in front of you. Choose it. But I wanna know, at the end of this week and this month and this year and the rest of your life, you're reflecting back, will you be happy? Is that the choice that you wanna make? Because we're all afraid. It doesn't make you interesting to me. It makes you a member of the card carrying human race. Right, Exactly. You're scared. Join the club. Do it Anyway. .

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I love that. So,

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Uh, , so we work on, and I will say, now I say it flippantly. I I truly need someone where they're at. Some people can move more quickly, others need a little bit more time because that narrative is so entrenched that they can't or they shouldn't or they have no right to

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Yes. Well, Maureena, before we conclude, I wanna make sure everybody, uh, has your coordinates. Where do we find you learn more about your work?

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? So, um, Maureen Fvi, I'm the lead coach and trainer at Strong training and coaching. So you will find us@markstrongcoaching.com. Yes. F

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Fantastic.

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We love the work that we do and we'd love to do it as often as possible.

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Yes. Well, let me look back and look ahead with you personally. I, I think about all the things and, and examples, uh, you've shared. But if you can think of a time in your career, you're in an agency, you're coming up the ladder or you're managing teams where you wish you would've had the kind of coaching you're providing now, it's like, would it have changed? I turned left, I turned right at the fork in the road here. .

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Yes. I wish that that, um, I would've had more feedback. I wish that people would've been so, and it all is, you know, in it really getting that we're not perfect, that we're on this earth to grow. But I waited 20 years in my career to get any constructive feedback and it was so helpful to me. And so looking back, I wish that we were more generous with feedback, with a backdrop of getting that of course, we're not perfect. And the most caring thing we can do to our peers and our bosses and our direct reports is to generously feed back to them how they're doing for the benefit of their growth and development.

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Wonderful. And then looking ahead, uh, thinking about your wish, uh, on the W o O P scale, , you know, I think of all the creative energy and all the potential collaboration that could come through this podcast even, and people listening Well, what is your wish going forward?

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? Um, I'm laughing because I just saw, I,

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This is a non-confidential coaching session by the way, totally out there.

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I, it's, it's so funny we asked that. I just found this old, um, if Satchi, we did this leadership course and, uh, and it said, What do you wanna do? It took that quote from Mary Oliver, What do you wanna do with your one wild and precious life? And I said, quote unquote, I wanna light a spark. Hmm. So whether that's through coaching or training or speaking or wonderfully being on your podcast today, I wanna light a spark cuz I don't actually see anything in your way.

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Fantastic. Well thanks for sharing that little personal moment there. Well, listeners, my guest has been Maureen Fy, she's a coach with, uh, Mark Strong training in coaching and we've gotten some real life examples, but also real life tips and exercises and techniques to really rethink, you know, our goals. It's like, don't just put it out there and say, Oh, I have a goal. But also, you know, look at the opportunities, look at the obstacles, look at the, the things that are gonna get in your way and a plan to work around them. And even today, I think about Maureen, is is there something that you would advise people as under the head end of just start? You know, is there a step, Just take a step in the direction of your wish. Uh, what, what are you finding that people could take a step towards?

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Yeah. Um, first find someone that you're going to figure out what that step is, Say it out loud to someone else. And then my first post of the year was a mug that on the front of it it said, Do the damn thing . So this is my message to you, be afraid and do it anyway. Mm-hmm. . So, and a lot of people say, Oh, there are 10 things I need to do. No you don't. There's one inspired action that you're going to take. Cuz guess what happens when you take that inspired action? It builds your confidence and then you're ready for the next and you're ready. So don't look at, never look at it as 10 things. What is one inspired action you could take today on the path to achieving your goals?

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So good. Yeah. And listeners that could be make that phone call, it could be send that email, it could be make that proposal, it could be set an appointment with that coach and more Reem will say yes to that call. I'm sure . So thanks again for coming by listeners and come back again next time. We're gonna stamp our passport, uh, with another creative practitioner around the world on how they get inspired and how they organize their rights ideas. And as we've heard today, we need to have the confidence, many times the connections for sure. It's who you know, but most of all, the confidence to take that step that Maureen and I have been talking about to unlock your world of creativity. So we'll see you next time. I'm Mark Stinson for unlocking your world of creativity. Bye for now.